THUD Toronto campaign

K-Dough is hereby challenging all Toronto cyclists to help control the horrid lack of road safety displayed by other cyclists every day by policing ourselves and joining the THUD Toronto (Torontonians Heckling Unsafe Drivers) campaign. The prevalent opinion that has emerged over the past week in the media, however misguided as it may be, is that poor innocent cyclists are daily persecuted by crazed anti-bike car drivers.

Well, the reality is that the majority of cyclists on our city streets are a bunch of law-ignoring, cocky/stupid jackasses who flirt with their own demises every day, flouting rules and riding like pompous 8 yr olds with entitlement complexes.

So it's really up to us- the cycling community- to make sure they know how the respectable and law-abiding among us feel about their retarded behaviour on the road.

What can you do? Every time you stop at an orange or red light and witness some stupid idiot riding gingerly half-way across the intersection and then through it; or someone speeding through the red light with no regard for their own, or others' safety yell as loud as you can: "THUD!!!" THUD is the sound of a body crunching under the wheels of a car or truck.

Or, yell THUD as you are taking a picture of them with your cell phone and post it online. Better yet, get the attention of a police officer and have them chase the idiot down.

It's not enough to whine and whinge about how cyclists are getting a raw deal when so many of us are ignorant, reckless idiots. Do something about it. Remind a stupid THUD near you that he/she is being watched.

You can JOIN a THUD facebook group organized by my buddy here: http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?topic=10370&uid=132728591329#/group.php?gid=132728591329

Framing the Discussion

Metro Morning just interviewed the huggy feel-good Yvonne Bambrick from Toronto Cyclists Union and the context they have put this tragedy in is one of cyclists rights and education: Should cyclists be licensed? How can cars and cyclists get along?

Of course, the feel gooder said cyclists need to feel more welcomed by society. Yup. That was her response to a question about how to help the problem of rampant ignorance of traffic rules. She went on to say, of course they need to obey rules, but they also need to break them to stay alive.

Hm Yvonne. Does include running red lights? Riding on sidewalks? Riding in oncoming lanes when its suits them to get around red lights?

Let's get it right people: the Bryant incident was about people and rage: assault. It had nothing to do with the mode of transportation each chose.

Hellllo Strangers...

I know it's been a while. Thought you'd never hear from me again? Well, certain recent events have forced me to consider coming out of retirement.

Stay tuned for some gaseous vitriol- it's building up and desperately needs to be expunged ... very soon.

Kisses, K

Media Mogul Mao Harper

What is this bullshit about a new media centre that Harper and his retarded flying monkeys are building? (HERE) Has Canada somehow been time-machined back into 1960s China? Next he'll be buying his own newspaper and torturing journalists in a dungeon, just like Conrad Black.

Dictatorial cocksucker.

New Political Landscape

Apparently, there is a New Political Landscape in Canada, in the wake of the Quebec by-elections. But for those who fear change, the great news is that we still have the same old unimaginative, clichéd TV journalism you've been enjoying for years. Joy! Notwithstanding their common overstated generalization, the fact that these identical taglines ran at exactly the same moment on CTV Newsnet and CBC Newsworld two days ago, is, well, puzzlingly coincidental. Or is it? (cue undead Michael Jackson Thriller face and insane laughter):

Knaked News

Speaking of sucking and blowing, funny thing happened to me on the way to work this morning... No wait: I just drove in from Talahasee, and boy is my screwdriver tired. (Ba dum dum- spshhh)

But seriously, my greased and horny pot-bellied piglets, today I am offering you a quick rounding up of the truly bizarre in two ridiculous sentences. And here it is:

Even though unfathomably stupid teen beauty contestant Lauren Caitlin Upton did not win the famed Dumb As A Pool Noodle But I'd Love to Schtoop You contest, she is rumoured to be dating Leona Helmsley's dog Trouble, who just inherited a cool $12 million, and has quit her job as the CEO of a major Bay Street Investment house, where other stupid, yet great looking people are overworked. Helmsley's clearly insane financial decisions left her peniless and dead in some guy's garage, after being treated for blemishes by a Viennese descendant of Beethoven's private doctor, who is rumoured to be having an affair with gay denier and 3 term Republican senator, Larry Craig.

Whoosh! Oh yeah, and I'm not wearing underwear. Or overwear for that matter.

Britney Sucks Off a Moose

The vag wasn't enough. The dangerous driving wasn't enough. The public disdain for the aesthetic smear of a carelessly displayed Caesarean scar wasn't enough. The Madonna faux-lesbo kiss wasn't enough. The divorce, rehabs and head shaving bullshit weren't enough.

Now what? A breakdown? Well, I guess fucking so.

This stuff happens to average people with no talent everyday. The trials and tribulations of the infinitely rich with no talent? Who the fuck cares. Get a life, world.

CFNY the Edge Airs Anti-Abortion Ads

So, last night, I was listening to CFNY FM 102.1 The Edge - a Toronto radio station- and in the middle of all the so-called "cool alternative kids music" I hear a 15 second anti-abortion ad spot from a group called Niagara Region Right To Life*. It went something like this:

When they say that abortion is a matter between a woman and her doctor, aren’t they forgetting someone? I did….abortion harms more than just the baby.

The Edge has always billed themselves as being the voice of cool- the hip, new, left-of-centre rad Indie supporting station with integrity. What this confirms to me is The Edge is nothing more than a blunt fuckin' grapefruit spoon.

To anyone out there in an advertising or marketing position with a company that advertises on the Edge: You should reconsider giving them your business. The Edge is not what you think it is. They are allowing people to broadcast messages that blatantly disrespect a woman's right to have control over her own body. Plain and simple. A woman's right to choose is inalienable- it's her body, not that of some right wing, religious zealot Niagara nutcase.

Boycott the Edge! Others have been successful at having the same ads pulled in Hamilton- check THIS out. Contact the Edge via their contacts page HERE and complain!

*Checked them out. They do not have a web site, but THESE nutters seem to be behind the campaign to get the ads back on the air in Hamilton. Stop them by contacting Y108 HERE and letting them know what you think!

Update: Both Y108 and the Edge are owned by Corus Entertainment. I'm sure they'd love to hear from you as well! Contact them HERE.

Is the CBC Anti-Palestinian?

Have you checked out any of the nonsense going on in Toronto surrounding a failed motion before the local branch of the Ontario Secondary School Teachers' Federation? A Jewish teacher named Jason Kunin "who has often criticized the Israeli government"* drafted a motion that would have condemned Israel's treatment of Palestinians and called for classroom materials to be developed to support such a condemnation. Basically, it was a promo gimmick to air his views and attract attention using the union as a mouth piece. Whatever. Vote it down (which membership overwhelmingly did) and move on, right?

What pisses me off is that any time someone criticizes Israel they are immediately labelled anti-Israel or anti-Semitic even. Lighten the fuck up you PC knee-jerk-offs. The CBC's headline speaks volumes about the bias in our society: Anti-Israel motion defeated by Ontario teachers union local. Radio station CFRA posted this headline on their web site: Union Rejects 'Anti Israel' Motion, and the Canadian Press wrote this: Teacher's anti-Israel resolution angers many.

I haven't actually read the entire motion, but from what the CBC itself reported there was no overt anti-Israelism or hateful view being expressed. Even the union head said it was legitimate subject for debate.

You know, it is possible to oppose policy without being hateful. This is dangerous. It's the same bullshit American "support the war or you're not supporting the troops" crap that is constantly thrown around south of the border. Aren't we a little more intelligent than that?

You can check out details of Kunin's view's HERE.

*Source: CBC.ca

Mainstream Imitates Blogging

Maybe I've been living under a rock, but have you checked out the Globe and Mail online version lately? Notice anything different about their format? There are now comments links for every single article. If bloggers thought we were going to remain enigmatic guerilla journalists forever, look out -- you are about to become mainstreamed! Yes, the MSM is mowing your lawn kids.

This new comment capability is something I think will transform the nature of those dinosaurs of the broad sheet. The Globe has instantly taken on the look and feel of a blog with authority. The mainstream media has melted into the blogosphere here in a fascinating combination of mediums.

It looks like the good Globe people are doing this in earnest, but I can't help but wonder about new accountability issues that undoubtedly will come into play for them. They are de facto publishing unsolicited commentary from the general public, which includes, as others have found, nutcases, racists and a plethora of haters that no sensible human would want leaving dirty footprints on their sites. Trying to moderate these could seriously become an expensive, time consuming nightmare and bring up new questions about editorial control versus the free nature of public comments sections.

Just ask Pierre Bourque over at Bourque Newswatch, who tried allowing comments for a while earlier this year but had to abandon the practice after realizing that he could not effectively control the haters, ideologues and cheap spam trollers due to time constraints.

Sure, the Toronto Star and National Post have their resident bloggers. Actually, I'm not so impressed with the Star online these days as they seem to be going through a bit of a prolonged identity crisis. I mean, nice new look, but where is Zerb? Either way, in my opinion, the Star remains the leading mainstream online supplier of breaking news in Canada, owing to their consistent updates throughout the news day with wire stories and local scoops. They were innovators but they are increasingly lagging. But I digress.

If we could just get just one online Canadian paper to give us the whole nine yards, including resident bloggers, comments and trackback links from Technorati, like the Washington Post does to show what individual bloggers are writing about their articles, we would be making some serious progress. (To see how Technorati works, scroll down on the right side of my home page and click on Blogs That Link Here. The site crawls the web looking for your url and permalinks and let's you know who has linked to anything you've written.)

But alas, personal experience reminds me that technological change and bureaucratic process are often at odds with each other, so we will have to be patient and wait. That said, Canada's online papers have come a helluva long way since just last year baby...

Exciting times for giddy technophiles and communications peeps.

Motion Sickness

Last night, people like Rex Murphy and Michael Chong were making the argument that the concept of Canada is based on inclusiveness and not on favouring certain "ethnicities". Rex Murphy even went so far as to say that all MPPs in Ottawa should be asserting the nationhood of Canada over any symbolic support of specific ethnic groups.

Did these guys grow up in the same country as I did? Because the last time I checked, our CONSTITUTION recognized French as one of the two distinct national languages of Canada. Now, if enshrining the linguistic representation of a culture in the supreme law of a land is not favouring one - or in this case, two- ethnicities, I really don't know what the hell is.

I don't understand why they didn't just come out and say that they do not support bilingualism, because that would be the absolute logical extension of their arguments.

Look, the British did not have the will (money?) at a certain stage of their colonial expansion to crush the French and their culture and force them to assimilate into a monolithic Anglo mold. It is a legacy we have to live with, but it is also a mixed blessing. We have to ask ourselves: Would we be so tolerant of other ethnic groups if the French and English hadn't have set such a cohabitative (and codependent) example? I say no. That division has made us stronger and unique.

Reluctantly, I have to side with Harper in this case. Even though his reasons for initiating this motion were less than altruistic, it seems a much more effective way of dealing with the endless volleys from the Pirate Ship Bloc than the vague, two-faced don't-upset-anyone leadership of days of yore. I wasn't one of those jackasses who marched to Montreal during the last referendum chanting "Canada loves you", but I do generally like living next to them and am willing to do so for the foreseable future. I suspect most Quebecers and Canadians for that matter feel the same in their hearts.

Let's just get the fuck on with it.

Addendum: We can't simply view this age old division in the context of the past. For a fascinating discussion about how technology is reshaping our culture/governments and pushed minority groups like Quebec to demand recognition of their otherness, you may want to check out this interview with Marshall McLuhan's son Eric (click HERE).

Urban Vignettes #3: Media and Murder

One of those urban vignettes sparked yet another Category 1 electrical synapse storm in the perilous Sea of K-Brain this morning. You may recall, a few years back during the last provincial election in Ontario, that the Tories circulated a now famous release saying something like "Dalton McGuinty is a reptilian kitten-eater". It was one in a million of frivolous, joking party-to-party news releases, but it ended up becoming an issue because the media got a hold of it and decided to make an issue of it.

Yes, the media decided to make an issue of it even though they see these things on a DAILY basis and understand the tenor and purpose of them. Subsequently, despite our reverence for the higher principles of democracy, the sophomoric phrase became the tagline that helped to undermine the Progressive-Conservative campaign.

But today, I read another blurred tagline as I sped past the Chinese Consulate on St. George Street in Toronto. The latest Falun Gong banner that backdropped a few aged protesters read: Communist Regime Kills Falun Gong For Organs.

Now, whether the claim is true or not, it sounds like a damn serious accusation to me. And it's not like it was whispered in secret circles or even sent out in an obviously snarky faux-release meant as an inside joke instead of a public statement. Nope. This is a disturbing message written in bold characters on a large banner, which accuses a government with which we enjoy warm diplomatic relations of a dark, horrific Nazi-like crime.

Wouldn't you think that at a time when the federal government's self-proclaimed crusade for human rights issues in China and around the world was an international story that our domestic media might want to take some slight note of such a claim? Nope.

I mean, I know St. George is a little out of the way compared to - oh, 1 Yonge, King or Queen Streets, but hello: If you can build a story that helped topple a provincial government based on something that was meant to be a joke, why not extend that dedicated activism to taking a very serious issue seriously and covering the fucking thing?

Montreal Police: A Little Confused

Media reports today say female police officers in Montreal are being told to call in their male counterparts to deal with uncooperative Hasidic Jews. You see, these zealous men just can't interact with females due to their religious beliefs. Well, I for one, think this is a seriously complex issue that calls for sensitive cross-cultural communication strategies and... ok- if you fell for that you've never been here before. My solution?

You move to Canada you respect our legal institutions and those that enforce the laws of the land. If you don't, you get your ass charged with obstruction of justice. Can you imagine a black kid in Regent Park refusing to look at or talk to a female police officer while being questioned? He'd be head-locked and handcuffed before you could say Rodney King is my daddy.

Aren't we in Afghanistan trying to stop the same kind of shit from happening? Why would we come down hard on Muslims for practicing Sharia Law, yet treat Hasidic Jews with kid gloves? While these imported religious based systems are effective at keeping the courts unclogged by certain civil disputes, we can't allow their use when it comes to criminal issues. I don't think most Jews or Muslims demand that either.

Neither should get preferential treatment. I say it's one country (well, one country with one nation within that country), one law (well, one special legal system for Quebec), and one way to deal with people who expect that they should be able to follow some extra-territorial law of their choosing. It's bullshit. Next thing you know, Libertarians will be refusing to pay taxes.

Is this really what Trudeau and the gropey-huggy-feely dudes had in mind in the 70s? Nuh uh. Multiculturalism is great, as long as it does not infringe on the constitutional or charter rights of others, or violate the laws of the land. Period. Don't like it? Blow me before leaving. Oh and make me a sandwich on your way out, would ya?

Disclaimer: Before anyone starts freaking the fuck out, I have to say, I am in no way suggesting that Hasidic Jews, en masse or singularly, are defying the law. My opinion is based solely on media reports about the police newsletter circulating in Montreal instructing officers that only males should deal with Hasidic Jews. The advice contained in that newsletter may be based purely on a few isolated experiences. I don't know.

The Cantorontario Star

Everyone knows the Toronto Star is T.O.-centric. In fact, in the past, their executives have made no bones about it. Hell, that's why I read it. But something struck me this morning as I clicked through the Star's online version: Their CANADA section contains mostly stories about ONTARIO. Now this revelation may not seem so shocking to media junkies, but what exactly does it mean?

My guesses are as follows:

a) There is absolutely nothing happening anywhere else in the country that anyone wouldn't rather tear their fingernails out than read about. If a tree or government, for that matter, falls in Saskatchewan only the deer need hear.
b) Southern Ontario is indeed, the centre of the Canadian universe. Why fight it? We know you all come here disguised as Americans (not so easy for you East Coasters) on your alloted 2 week vacations every year and gaze at the big buildings and stressed out people. Admit it.
c) Toronto's mayoralty race will have real implications for the people of Nunavut. David Miller will sweep your fishing village clean of seal scraps- or at least divert them to an ecologically-efficient processing facility.
d) The Star is lazy and cheap. Unless the news falls into its lap from some spitting-distance-to-One Yonge Street source, the cost benefits do not warrant pursuing it.
e) Only people in Cantorontario read newspapers online.
f) Just after completion of the CPR, when the Star was founded, its execs adopted the slogan "If you want to know, now you can go!".

Whatever the case, the Star really needs to pull up its pants and start meeting the claim that it actually reports on national affairs in addition to Cantorontario news. If you claim it, then be accountable and prove it.

House of Cards Falls

I wonder if Stephen Harper saw his future pass before his eyes as he watched hawkish girders fall from the house of cards last night on CNN? Yes, Stevie, like Americans, we are all fatigued- but not in the way you and your soda-pop swilling, armchair Rambos would dress us.

Take heart though. One day, you and GWB will be playing paint ball at a Christian dude ranch in Texas somewhere, having a laugh over sasparilla and some meaty BBQ about all the girls and boys you helped kill. Good times. And even though you won't have your soft, uncalloused exquisitely-moisturized hands all over the purse strings that strangle others, you'll always have Kandahar and video games.

So yeehaww- shoot 'em up Tex! While y'all still got all them taxpayers' bullits at yer disposal!

StatsCan Make You Rich!

In the Toronto Star today, we learn that a recent StatsCan survey "suggests the vast majority of Canadian adults feel there is a strong relationship between education and success in life." Hmm. So, let me get this straight. The survey doesn't actually prove that education leads to success in life. Nor does StatsCan attempt to prove that remaining stupid and/or uneducated leads to failure in life. Rather, it seeks to answer the burning societal question so many of us have repeatedly pondered over the years: How many Canadians believe that education leads to success?

What I want to see is a breakdown of respondents in the following groups: Stupid, Smart, Success, Failure. Moroever, because this survey was about what people believe rather than what is proven, I think it would be methodologically useful to consider more detailed, somewhat less empirical aspects of the respondents' characters, like these, for instance:
1. Does the person believe in ghosts?
2. Does the person immediately forward e-mails to everyone they know, which warn that cell phones can light your hair on fire and spontaneously make your colon explode if you use them at gas stations?
3. Is the person obsessive-compulsive or Catholic or both?
4. Does the person habitually smoke marijuana cigarettes?
5. Does the person believe in political altruism?

I'll tell you one thing that the StatsCan survey clearly demonstrates: That an education in statistics and/or sociology can make you one well-fed civil servant.

Get Your Business Black Belt!

Yesterday, media across North America carried a story about a new report that claims "Graduate business students in the United States and Canada are more likely to cheat on their work than their counterparts in other academic fields". What the story didn't say, however, was that students found cheating are likely given preferential treatment by teachers precisely because they cheated. These polyester-skinned little Trump-omatons are probably the first ones trotted out at corporate job fairs as the schools' best prospects. Cheating is an art especially useful in business, and requires deft ability - whereas bullshiting is more of a liberal arts virtue.

One can just imagine the so-called business professors locked up in Zen-like retreats, planning how they will circuitously instil profound lessons about their trade in the minds of the their empty-vessel, grasshopper-like protegees. They probably devise ridiculous rules like "Don't Cheat!" and post them, written on wooden planks above the chalkboards in the classrooms, just to weed out the weak from the crafty, or as they like to call the cheaters: Innovators.

Whether or not this study has any methodological merit, it makes one ponder how many of these paper-peeping plagiarist pupils end up plopped into political office positions though, don't it?

Animals, Asses and Appropriateness

"Guy Fournier, the chair of CBC's board of directors, resigned yesterday amid a growing furor over his remarks about the joys of defecation and the legality of bestiality in Lebanon." (TO Star)

Ooooooh-k then. So he made some jokes about sex with animals and talked about pooping. I don't get it. What did he do wrong? I thought the CBC was part of the entertainment industry? Aren't funny jokes and a sense of humour crucial factors in the field of entertainment? On second thought, judging from CBC programming (AirFarce!) there may be strong cases against that assertion.

In any case, Mr. Fournier if you are looking for some online exposure for your inappropriate comedy routine, I hereby invite you to become a regular contributor to K-Dough's Canada! Of course, you'd have to change your name to Guy "Mandude" Pornier, but trust me- you'd be gold baby! Gold.

Do Psycho Groupies Read Newspapers?

Apparently not. Judging from Ashley Harrison's myspace page (if that is indeed the infamous Ashley) she has no clue that her e-mails to one of Canada's most read columnists were publicized yesterday. Who can blame her though- with all the crap on TV that needs watching and the countless line of black-lipsticked necrophiliac vampire guys that need flirting with online. I think that one of you - the sensible public - should take it upon yourselves to find her page, cut and paste her publicly available e-mail address in to an e-mail and let her know what a flap her teen tard comments have caused. You know, give her a chance to defend or explain herself. A friend of mine let Rosie DiManno know yesterday, but has heard not a peep back fom her yet.

I want to run something by y'all and see what you think. Ashley has a graphic posted on her page which reads: 4-20 Remember the Real Victims. The date 4-20 refers to the date of the Columbine massacre and the graphic contains the pictures of the two teen monster killers and a rose. It is a tribute to the psycho-geeks who killed all those innocent victims and destroyed so many of the survivors' lives. Under the graphic, Ashley wrote this:
"R.I.P. Kimveer Gill... you fucked up! but there are a few of us out there who understood you, and know you weren't a bad person, you made the most sense out of everything... good people do bad things too."

Is this tolerable free speech? Isn't there something someone somewhere should be doing about this kind of evil crap? How do you reason with such callous ignorance? To me, it indirectly preaches hate and glorifies murder. Is it the same as those empty gansta culture threats or different? To me, it seems conspicuously different. At least rappers have a discernible goal in glorifying violence- ass, money and social injustice. But this is an entirely different twisted mind-set. It's the glorification of the senseless murder of innocent people by immature, morally bankrupt urban white trash kids without consciences. And worse, it is the deification of killers as if they were victims - literally forced to kill because society made their lives too painful. It is the ultimate in childish irresponsiblity, but it is coming from young adults.

Or maybe I'm reading too much into this. Maybe it's just that kids like her thinks it's cool and iconoclastic to play devil's advocate. Maybe they get street cred points for crying a sympathetic black EMO tear for the killers, because well, you know, teen life is hard.

I don't know if you can tell but this shit is really bugging me this week. Though I know its wrong to tar and feather all kids, it makes me want to smack every sullen teen freak I see right in the neck. But as my friend Harding pointed out yesterday, justice is the only way to sort such things out. Violence does not end violence. Damn- when did I get all grown up?

Teen Psycho Groupies

I am addressing this post to whoever wrote to Rosie DiManno, prompting this piece (click HERE), published today in the Toronto Star. In e-mails to DiManno, some ignorant, melodramatic kid, who says her name is Ashley Harrison (*see update below!), defended Kimveer Gill's actions and sympathized with the psycho-geek. In lieu of any powerful or potent reply from DiManno, likely owing to the constraints imposed by her medium, I have composed my own response to the pugnacious Ms. Harrison, below.

Letter to Ashley Harrison, somewhere in Quebec:

Listen up, you out-of-touch teen tard: You think Kimveer Gill experienced insurmountable pain? He experienced nothing but selfish, narcissistic masturbatory loserhood. And that fate awaits you too, Ashley!

Kimveer Gill was not remarkable, intelligent or worthy of admiration. He couldn't spell. He wasn't original. His online names were all rip-offs (check my friend Harding's recent piece on one such example HERE). The polls he filled out on his page were mindless time-wasters for bored, lazy ass people without a shred of creativity in their empty heads and souls. He was out of work and probably spent most of his time jerking off to Japanese cartoons in his parent's house, which is where 25 year old losers like him belong, because they are cowardly chicken shits who never grow up. And that's what you are going to be Ashley: A loser, just like your psycho-geek idol.

Do you know why losers like you - Ashley Harrison- and Kimveer feel so different from others and oppressed by the popular, happy people? Because you deserve to feel that way. And hiding in computer fantasy land just prolongs the amount of time you will spend in your miserable life being a miserable loser with an artificial sense of power and belonging. You are the creator of your own undoing. No one is responsible for that but you.

Tell me Ashley Harrison, why should anyone care about you? What have you got to offer anyone other than your boring, pathetic self-pity? Do yourself a favour and shut the fuck up, pull the joystick out of your ass and do something about your problems instead of whining and wallowing away into your own oblivion.

Life is for the living, sweetie. It's not easy to solve problems or deal with pain. But you need to know something- no one has a monopoly on pain. You are not special. We all feel, hurt and bleed. The people you should most despise are those who blame and punish others for their own problems, like Kimveer Gill. That's probably what someone did to you along the line to make you the bitter little fuck that you are today. If you want to perpetuate that bullshit, you'd better get ready for a lifetime of disappointment, failure and sadness.

Ashley, you wrote: "Kimveer will be greatly missed by the people who actually understood him ... the people who don't have their heads up their asses." You know what, that would have been a much better way for that loser to die- with his head up my ass, choking on my shit.

This advice doesn't come cheaply either sweetie- I'm hard core through and through and had to claw my way to where I am now. I had a lot of friends like you in my life when I was younger who are now either dead or might as well be. That said, it's never too late to get your shit together. If you chose to continue on this path I encourage you to have a nice life - or whatever facsimile of a life it is that you manage to feebly and passively eke out.

Update: What is with this site's history with Ashleys? We now know who Ms. Harrison probably is, complete with pix and the school she attends in Quebec. In fact, you can view her myspace page by searching for her using her real name. I won't publish the link here, but I encourage you all to check out the face of stupid for yourselves.