Top 10 Social Revolutionary Terrorist Threats

If they really wanted to hurt us and change the fabric of North America for the good of the world, don't you think they'd pay more attention to these iconic targets? Stupid terrorists.

1. Large-scale Playstation Two sabotage.
   
2. Hijacking Donald Trump's hair and flying it into the Hollywood sign.
   
3. Assasinating food empire overlords Ronald McDonald and the Burger King.
   
4. Oprah book list burnings.
5. Preventing Krispy Kreme from releasing its planned whole wheat donut.
6. Army of classically-trained Eastern bloc musicians armed takeover of American Idol set.
7. Lobotomize Britney, Lindsey, Paris and Olsen twins and program them to control teen girls everywhere with messages of their own worthlessness while draining their parents' bank accounts. Oops, wait. Task accomplished.
8. Abducting and brainwashing Barney the Dinosaur and Donny Osmond to become hateful, bloodthirsty beasts and harnessing their new evil purple powers for the cause.
   
9. Instil proper moral ideals by ousting Ellen DeGeneris in a Coup DeTit and installing a bearded, fatigued Castro lookalike lesbian in her place. No more cheezy fucking dancing for anyone!
10. Mass credit card theft, with the proceeds used to purchase SUVs, which are then packed full of designer clothes and overpriced running shoes and driven into bank machines in the middle of the night.