Are the Spanish Retarded?

The Spanish Olympic men's basketball team posed for an ADVERTISEMENT in which they all pulled their eyes up at the side into a slant before the Olympics and they seem to see nothing wrong with it. I'm sorry? In an article that erroneously says the Spanish basketball team is trying to diffuse the damage they've done by mocking the physical characteristics of Asians, one Spanish player said this, "If we thought that it was going to offend anybody we would not do it. But if you think this is offensive you're not thinking in the right way, because it's not even a joke. It's just because we are coming to Beijing, we have this kind of eyes." The coach, Aito Garcia Reneses, pulled his baby bed covers over his face and said "Everybody is talking about something that I cannot understand."

Might as well have said "I'm a retarded Spanish dude. What the fuck do I know?".

Iz all I'm sayin'.

New K-Dough Blog: Coming NOW!

Yo kids: Pls visit a fresh new joint, published by K-Dough starting NOWish. This summer, I will be blogging about road safety in Toronto and publishing descriptions, licence plate numbers and possibly photos of Toronto's Road Idiots as often as necessary.

The spokes and phrases start turning at Road Idiot T.O. today!

Check it out mofos!

K

Where It's At

I got two-turntables and a microphone. Sorry, couldn't resist.

But seriously you sick little monkey-fuckers, I just wanted to let anyone know who's actually wondering where I'm at, uh, where I'm at.

The real K-Dough is busy writing a book right now, so that's where all my creative juices are collecting like gravy from a well-choked, but still slightly moist chicken.

Someday I may be back. You can only hope, I guess.

Love you all like my own sister. Wait, that didn't come out right.

Let's talk soon or have a beer. All of us?

K

Media Mogul Mao Harper

What is this bullshit about a new media centre that Harper and his retarded flying monkeys are building? (HERE) Has Canada somehow been time-machined back into 1960s China? Next he'll be buying his own newspaper and torturing journalists in a dungeon, just like Conrad Black.

Dictatorial cocksucker.

Cry Baby Tory Blaming Others

When questioned today about why he included funding for faith-based schools in his platform, even though 3 years ago his party knew it would flop, John "Cry Baby" Tory said: "I never had control of the message." Hm. If the central issue of this election was leadership, does it sound very leader-like for the leader of a party to have never had control of his own party's message?

Then, blaming the media for his dismal performance, he said "Did I say it (faith-based school funding) was the issue of the campaign? Never once."

Who the fuck cares what you say is the issue of the campaign John Q. Tory? You released your platform and people focussed on what they wanted to focus on. That's democracy John, you spoiled, corporate hollow man. Take off the tear-stained dress and suck it up princess.

Urban Vignette #45-A.

Having suffered some memory damage due to a severely dehydrated brain, I just recalled a strange thing that happened on my way to getting hammered with the illustrious Sheena last night. Two guys in a white Cherokee pulled up to the curb beside me as I walked up the street and said "Hey dude. Do you want a home theatre system?" I said "what?". The guy reiterates his generous offer and points to the back of the truck. I said, "uh, no I'm good". Dude tried harder. He says "seriously dude, do you want this home theatre system? We just scored it from work".

WTF? Brilliance seems to know no bounds in the city I love.

An Environmental Treatise

Warning: The following blog post contains excessive use of foul language. Proceed with caution.
RATED: "R" for Retard.

If one more luxury fossil-fuel burner-driving, pin-dicked Forest Hill cocksucker honks incessantly or makes obscene gestures or comments to me while I am legally waiting in the middle of a fucking goddamn intersection to turn left on my environmentally-friendly fucking bicycle, I am going to:

• Leap from my hybrid onto said cocksucker's windshield.
• One-fist punch a hole in said windshield and in one motion rip the keys from the ignition, jamming them in his motherfucking mocha-choka-latte, country clubbing, pasty white thigh.
• Pull the vehicle to a stop as he screams and writhes in pain and his own urine.
• Pull the asshole from his polluting penis substitute by his Blackberry.
• Force him to his knees and duct tape his mouth around the tailpipe.
• Put the hammer to the metal and leave him to choke on his own toxic fumes.

Motherfucker goddamn cock shit!!!

Thanks. I feel a lot better now.