Out of Commission
If you are hanging around here today looking for fresh young copy to gulp down - like the sadistic e-sharks that you are - you are bound to be dissapointed. K-Dough is too sick to write today and his pounding brain can't come out and play. And no guilt trips please. K-Dough gives you his all - day in day out. Isn't it enough that he lifted his aching lead-filled digits to wearily sputter out this considerate message? Isn't it enough for you sick rabble that, in doing so, he was forced to stop every couple of words to sop up the nose drool that made the keys too slippery to type with? I love you all, but there is only so much of the Dough to go around. I've been rolling-pinned thin and must recouperate.
In the meantime, while you wait for the birth of new baby K-words, check out the latest comments on my posting about Ashley MacIsaack (here) from last week. Could this really be him? If anyone has evidence to the contrary please fill me in...
In the meantime, while you wait for the birth of new baby K-words, check out the latest comments on my posting about Ashley MacIsaack (here) from last week. Could this really be him? If anyone has evidence to the contrary please fill me in...
posted by K-Dough at 9:43 AM
67 Comments:
Damned bird flu. When we will find a cure?!
I know. I guess I should really start wearing condoms.
As for the alleged Asher, interesting. Just might be him. Ask him to play something for you.
I checked his dyslexia excuse- looks like the real Asher actually might have it.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm...
Very interesting. It could be him but it's probably the last time he'll visit your site. There's nothing like making fun of a person's disability - I, for one, never stick my foot in my mouth.
Hope that rash clears up, I hear penicillin helps what ails ya.
You could ask him to e-mail a picture of his testicles (sans Flapper Snapper, of course). Would you remember him/them?
boy, he reads a little bitter. not exactly trying to win our hearts and minds is he.
and little does he know, half the bloggers on this site were members of Platinum Blonde. Not exactly annoying fiddle music and full montys, but nothin' to sneeze at either.
Chucker- re: platinum blonde- lol!
I agree that his media relations bedside manner is a little weak...
Or maybe we are just not used to "honesty"?
Everybody, I shit you not....but there's a point to this story that relates to the "Ashley" post. During the run-up to New Year's Eve '99, MuchMusic had an ad for a turn-of-the century retrospective on the history of rock video. The deep guy voiceover said "we'll review the good, the bad and the truly horrid" ...on the "truly horrid" there was a shot of YOURS TRULY. This ad ran several times a day.(Wasn't Platinum Blonde Chucker, but close....very fucking close..)
I had friends calling me up saying "this isn't right dude, they're making fun of you twenty years later...they can't do that." There actually was a point of contention here; MuchMusic was a brand new entity then, and they were heavily involved in the production of videos at that time...they recommended the companies to use, the style of videos they were favouring for their content, and even showed up on the set to offer creative input. If you wanted to get played and sell records, you just did what they said, no matter how astronomical the cost, or how much you didn't like (or in my case, didn't care) what the stupid thing looked like. For them to turn around twenty years later and say "ha ha...what a bunch of dicks" is a bit precious, but you know what? I had a good, embarrased laugh. One of my lawyer friends even called me and suggested I take some action. I just remembered all the great gigs, all the great money and all the chicks, and figured this was a small price to pay.
If that is the real Ash, he needs to develop a sense of humour. Laugh at yourself dude, it's just fucking music.
And K-Dough is correct: unless you've made enough money to scratch your bag and become a recluse for the rest of your life, you haven't made it in the industry.
leatherhands,
you've notched my curiosity-meter up by a hundredfold.
I feel like a hobbit with a riddle -
Not Platinum Blonde, but very, very close.
hmmmm.
Honeymoon Suite?
Whitesnake?
you aren't an ex-european who did that "Live is Life" song did you?
are you the guy with the nose?
Ok- the cat is outta the bag. In truth, he is the former lead singer of Men Without Hats.
now, I'm lost.
Men Without Hats?
Impossible.
They were an awesome band that no one should make fun of, except perhap Bon Homme Carnivale.
Pop goes the world.
LOVE IT! This is better than being sexually ambiguous.....and obscure enough to make a great Canadiana trivia challenge.
First Clue: Chucker, we weren't nearly as big as bands like Whitesnake, but we had two decent hits and a good run in Canada. We have been described as a "one hit wonder" (accurate) and a "poor-man's Platinum Blonde" (inaccurate...we were blue-eyed soul, going for the Hall and Oates demographic.)
This was pre-heavy Leatherhands. We were more R&B/pop than rock. We were very gay looking. (Then again, so was everybody else.)
1st single to chart was in '85...any takers?
No, no, no..he was the butchy chick in the GoGos. You remember, the one with the big hands?
Pam, LOL!!! I loved the butchy chick in the Go-Gos. Always went for the Tom-boyish types. Still do.
Hmmm.....Parachute Club?
Am I close?
Nope...a little more obscure than that. Parachute Club had a longer run of radio play. This is only for REAL Canadiana pop/rock encyclopedia types.
Guess 1 (40% chance of being right):
8 seconds.
"Kiss you when its dangerous"
Guess 2 (60% chance):
Chalk Circle
"April Fool"
This is comedy...I already know the answer but I'll play along....
ummmmmmmmmm, you are that guy that played with Nash the Slash!
Or no- you were in Slik Toxik.
Or Harem Scarem!
Chucker, I'm impressed. You've come very close to my Battleship tm.. Sooo close.
We were nominated with Chalk Circle for most Promising Juno that year....NO GOOGLING..
April Wine.
Mitsou!!!!!! I knew you were stalking me!
Is your real name Dave Ketchum?
Havril...think obscure. April Wine had a billion hits. And they were not R&B pop.
It should be obvious to everyone that he's none other than Alan Frew of Glass Tiger.
By the way, my family loved you in Snow White and the Group of Seven. I have to ask - does Ross Petty wear drag on account of his pendulous man breasts?
I meant to retract my April Wine answer. Anyway, I couldn't help but Google, so consider me out of the game.
April Wine is not possible. I know the drummer. They are from Mtl.
Glass Tiger is a mega-band. No way the lead is talking to chumps like us.
holy shit. I just broke the no google rule -
you are the lead singer from Glass Tiger.
You guys rock. Or let me put it this way:
you, take my breath away.
Love, thinks its here to stay.
but when I wake up and you're not there, pain finds me everywhere. ohhhhhhhhhhh but you don't care......
ps. calling my wife right now to tell her who you are.
all for the thin red line.
Glass Tiger? Ouch. They won that Juno and I've never forgiven them. They used Brian Adams on their first single, because they had Brian Adams' producer. That's fair. Let's see, you're a radio programmer in '85 and you get two debut singles from two new Canadian acts, and one of them has Brian Adams doing a guest vocal, the other does not. No, I'm not bitter anymore after twenty years...
too bad. my wife is thrilled. I'm not telling her otherwise, so when you come and visit chuckcanuck, you have to type with a scottish accent, m'kay?
Guys, I'm a drummer. A drummer who was a lead singer too. Obscure...
I'm sorry to hear that leather! You were robbed!
If it's any consolation, I attended a wedding a number of years ago where Alan Frew and his band were the evening's entertainment.
Nice to see Ashley staying in touch with his family heritage and emulating his distant cousin Allan J.
By the way leather- you have finally found a way to upstage me. Bastard.
Now, just for that, I'm going to reveal our true identities.
Leatherhands is really.......... ................................
................................
Sass Jordan.
I am really..........................
................................
the lead singer of Kick Axe.
Chris, Thanks for the Glass Tiger at the wedding story....you made my day. I've played some shit gigs, but NEVER a wedding...not even any of my own!
K-Dough,
It was not my intention to upstage you my friend, but that old faggy band of mine had to be good for something.. (I thought you were the lead singer for Prism...)
Chucker, here's a big hint:
"Flippin to the A side
Livin on the B side
nothing on the b side
loving long the wayside
...to the A side
....to the A side..
if you can name that band, I'll send you an autographed vinyl single. (If I can find one...)
Crap. What ever happened to Feargal Sharkey, anyways?
Whatever. Everyone knows you are really Buffy Ste. Marie leather so just give it up.
Y'all should be careful. In a few days you might have a post from buffystemarie ....Stranger things have happened on here..lately.
I was thinking it was Jane Siberry. I love her!!!!!
One more colour now...
Oh, and to Chuckercanuck: I do NOT love lilac, okay. That's a stereotype and it's not nice to stereotype people, see?
Why don't you just put down that Alberta Report you're reading and go for a drive in your gun rack-endowed, Steven Harper-bumperstickered pick-up truck and think about that for a while, okay?
Oh, and to Leatherhands, you mean I hit on you and you are a ROCK STAR??? GAWD!!!!! You're like, only the 36th rock star I've ever hit on! (Well, 37th actually, since I also said Ashley MacIsaac was good-looking and shaggable if the stuff he said that I won't mention again is not true).
Pam- tell me about it. It's a crazy cyber world we live in kiddies.
Screw the celebs ayways...who needs em when we have PAM!
I think it was definitely Chuckercanuck's lilac comment!!!!!
Other than that, I haven't noticed anything.
I wondered what he meant by that, too. He might have just read a few entries and taken them out of context.
I wonder if he's a Leafs fan. Gay, straight, who cares? It's not which team you're batting for, it's which team you're cheering for.
With his beautiful eyes, I could forgive Ashley a lot, including taking comments out of context, but I could never forgive him for being a Leafs fan!
well, I just want to say I think Homosuperior is doing the stereotyping.
I defy you to find a human being who doesn't enjoy the scent of lilac and the optimism of an eternal sring that lilac smells evoke.
It is outrageous to suppose that I suggested Homosuperior would like the lilac scented thongs because of the "homo" part of his name. It was entirely due to the "superior" part of his name.
No one else proclaims to have superior tastes like he does, so I appealed to them in the name of maybe bagging some interested investment bankers for K-Dough's business idea.
Oh, okay Chucker. I guess I ought not to have taken your comments out of context, eh?
You can just take your cowboy boots off and relax a little now. I accept your (sort of) apology.
As for me stereotyping, what the f are you talking about? I only took one typing course in my life and I sucked at it. I hate all forms of typing, mono, stereo or any others.
As for lilac, I will admit it has a sweetly seductive aroma. But it's still way down my list of favourite smells, which are in order of preference: 1) freshly scrubbed (i.e. right out of the shower) man; 2) freshly scrubbed man; and 3) baking bread -- especially French baguettes at a Parisian fournil.
I think it's very cool. And it's very catchy, leather. Thanks for sharing that story.
But let's be clear about one thing, please.
Cats CANNOT fly. They cannot. My cats would be very unhappy if my son caught wind of Cats Can Fly.
Any cat found on my property will learn to fly damn quickly.
I'm glad chucker and homo kissed (no tongue) and made up.
I'm still sick. Yuck.
Chucker, I knew you could do it. Only Chucker could post 3 new blogs, contribute to 26 others, and name an obscure band from the eighties. (Just to maintain some mytique, that was only my FIRST band...ha ha ha..you haven't completely solved the mystery of LeatherHands...)
Chucker, I'll do my best to dig up an old vinyl single from my storage. Stuff from that era is sparse.
Homo, Jane Siberry is one of my fave Canadian artists bar none. You rock. (In a lilac scented way..)
K-Dough, your blog is not even vaguely anti-gay. If that was Ashley, he is obviously going through some persecution complex, hence the testiness about the career. I know that feeling well. Your comment about apologizing for the drunk remark, but not for the nutty ball-sac remark should go down in the annals of "best ever apologies." That was a classic.
Leatherhands,
Come on. Internet is god.
Scatterbrain.
A selection I am particularly interested in is a song called.....
"Hippie Homicide"
I'm not making this up.
Hey K-Dough... while you're sick and out of commission, could you do a post on Morrisey and his whiney "Ban all things Canadian" crap that he's flinging to get attention? It'll make for some kick-ass commentary...
Just a suggestion.
leatherhands, I'm confused - I've read the whole thread & still can't decide if its "Cats Can Fly" or not. Why do the words sound familiar?
Marksomething- While I am all for laughs at other people's expense, I absolutely would not support recruiting loser no-mind haters just for the comedy value.
I would smoke their asses - and that's no bun pun.
Harding: re Morrisey. While I can't condone senseless violence, I can condone any legal measures possible to keep overrated whiney 80s pop singers like Morrisey out of the country for good!
Candace,
It was Cats Can Fly. We had one of those CanCon hits that they played the crap out of for months despite being a mediocre pop track at best, causing people to hate us and block it out. That's why it's only "vaguely familiar."
Chucker, you're still only ankle deep. TRUE STORY..."Scatterbrain" was among "fave albums of the year" by local Toronto Hell's Angels, and we played at a Hell's Angels venue for an obscene amount of money. They didn't clap once, but apparently they liked us. Hate to see what would have happened if they didn't.
They invited us back to their clubhouse after the gig; some of the other guys went, but I bailed.
Oh Yeah, K-Dough....I heard a classic track from StreetHeart on the Q the other day.....man you had a good set of pipes.
Thanks man but that wasn't me. How many times do I have to tell you- I'm the keyboardist from Blue Peter.
Coming from Brighton Rock's drummer, that wasn't really a compliment anyway.
K-Dough....so after singing the first two Moxy albums, you took up keys?
well, I bow to you all for your rocking good credentials.
No man- at that point I was shadow-playing for Rik Emmett, during his bout with carpal-tunnel.
Did I miss something? Streetheart? I was a huge Streetheart fan back in the day...
K,
That first album you did with Zon was really underrated. I played it 'till the limited edition blue vinyl wore out.
now, all K-Dough needs is a couple of leftovers from the original Degrassi cast and this blog is perfect.
now, all K-Dough needs is a couple of leftovers from the original Degrassi cast and this blog is perfect.
I'm still singing Get it on Credit..C'mon..
Pam LOL!!! Get it on Credit...possibly the worst title, most horrible album cover in history.
It was one of my most overplayed albums. I'm sure it's still around somewhere..Dammit, now I'll have to dig it out.
Little known K-Dough factoid:
I was Darby Mills' spandex crotch double for all close up shots in Headpins videos. And everyone thought it was just because she didn't shave that thing. Ha!
I think I know way too much- Mikey St. Serious!
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