Cheer Up Canada
A new "study" says Canada, if it were some monolithic, animated entity would be relatively unhappy compared to the other countries of the world. We scored 111th out of 178 countries on a feel-good scale. I, for one, have a problem with demographic studies like these. They look at key indicators in a very biased way. The way they structure the methodology simply prescribes the results. Why couldn't they construct a more realistic paradigm within which to rank countries? For instance, I'm sure we would be leaders in being miserable. We could blow the competition out of the water when it comes to mindless consumerism. Surely, we'd rank at the top of any selfish and ignorant scale.
The study said we would be a lot happier if we didn't leave such a giant ecological foot print. Why can't we just look on the bright side for a change? You know what they say about those with big feet, right? Christ, can't we just cheer up? What a bunch of pessimistic, cynical fucking assholes we've become. And why do we always have to swear so much?
Look, I can't type anymore! I feel the urgent need to go punch someone from a happy country in the neck. Anyone know where I can find a radiantly-smiling Vanuatuan?
The study said we would be a lot happier if we didn't leave such a giant ecological foot print. Why can't we just look on the bright side for a change? You know what they say about those with big feet, right? Christ, can't we just cheer up? What a bunch of pessimistic, cynical fucking assholes we've become. And why do we always have to swear so much?
Look, I can't type anymore! I feel the urgent need to go punch someone from a happy country in the neck. Anyone know where I can find a radiantly-smiling Vanuatuan?
Labels: Consumerist Bulllshit, Culture, Environment, Reports, Stupid
posted by K-Dough at 10:39 AM
34 Comments:
I thought the US radiated all those guys in the 60's testing Nukes...
Don't see what they have to be happy about... glowing green can't make you to happy can it?
The key to happiness is "beer", and "Scotch", and "illegal drugs".
Give a hoot, have a toot, then go find the beaver.
JC- At least one other Canadian knows the secret to eternal happiness of the spotty mind!!!
I was at the doctors the other day... he said I was in great health, but that if I didn't tame my party life I would put myself at risk for prostrate cancer, liver problems, and lung cancer...
I replied that I was busy getting ready for my heartattack, and unfortunately have no time for the other problems.
I can't wait for the Stampede to be over.
the whole summer is a stampede to me dood... I wish it lasted longer!
A wise friend once told me to find what you love and let it kill you.
Words to live by....ooohhmmm.
That would be my wife Pam... good advice though.
Everything we love kills us.
We (in the Western world) are all drowning in a huge gratification footprint filled with muddy tears of joy.
It's our own divine undoing. We are narcissists in narcosis.
I like the way you put it K-dough... narcissists in narcosis. Sounds so much better than "Pleasure Sluts".
JC- btw- loved your Boisclair portrait!
The moment I saw that pyscho little puppy, I knew it was Bosclair in drag.
It should be an unwritten rule that drugs and politics don't mix... well, at least you shouldn't admit to it.
Ah... who am I kidding. Everybody party like its 1929!
Once again, I offer the Visigoth perspective. As a Visigoth, I am very happy. My people have been in great spirits ever since we sacked Rome. In fact, if we hadn't had to share our glory with the lesser culture of Ostrogoths, we'd be blissed for eternity.
Man, you "Canadians" think you're miserable? You should watch a Roman Centurian burning on a stick. Now that's misery!!!
:-)
H-
I'm so fucking happy!
Harding- speaking of sacking Rome- did you read my last post?
Oh yes. Visigoths are also responsible for the invention of the bike post - so in essence we sacked that poor bastard as well!
K-Dough,
right on. bullshit with those statistics. does make us sound like the biggest fat-cat ingrates you ever did see, eh?
Maybe I'm not happy, but I know I'd be a lot more grey and miserable living in Europe.
If I were any happier, I'd be dead.
(Hic)
I think it's a bunch of bullshit. I'm a happy "Pleasure Slut" (catchy, I like it). I'd be happier if I could "use our natural resources to make Canadians happier" but that is still illegal in Canada, unfortunately.
Pam, It's what Mrs. Joe accuses me of being when she wants me to do something other than what I'm usually doing... which is nothing.
Unless it's being killed with love by Mrs. Joe. In which case I'm doing something, but that something is synonomous with my "Pleasure Slut" persona, which cheerfully, Mrs. Joe believes for the most part is a philosophy to adhere too.
Course', she knows about the life insurance, so thus the "killing me with love" thing.
God bless her evil little heart.
I'm so torn on this issue. I think my husband is worth more alive, PLUS who the hell would cut the grass? And there would be NOOOOOOOO Mr Pam #2. No sirree. He can kill himself softly with his Crown Royal and prime rib.
Crown royal and prime rib.............
Pam, with five words you put to shame the history of literature in describing heavan.
heaven. sorry, sometimes I spell it like Bryan Adams sings it.
Newsflash: Canadians seem to find happiness in discussing the covert ways they may or may not aid in the demise of their spouses. When asked to comment pop-media advice guru K-Dough said "I often quote the great Al Bundy, who said I'm a living example of how the brain really doesn't need blood to work. The brain doesn't need blood. It just needs to be kept wet. OR behind every successful man is a woman who didn't marry me. OR Sorry, Peg, I didn't hear you. I was thinking of killing myself."
J-dog- ahhhh the bliss of absolute unawareness and habitual drug use.
Thats a song isn't it?
"Killing me softly with my crown royal and prime rib, killing me softly, with my booze, killing me softly."
Something like that.
Pam,
Mrs. Joe says to tell you that she feels I'm worth more alive than dead as well, but she won't feel to bad about option two when it hits, and she's not interested in a Mr. Joe #2 either...
She says it will be more like "Mr. Kept Fireman without caller ID" when I go on to the choir eternal.
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I'm never sure when Mrs. Joe is joking around.
A lot of carrots there bunny boy.
Love is the drug that I'm thinkin' of.
k-dough,
your love is like bad medicine.
Well, it definitely leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Or should that be it melts in your mouth, not in your hands? I dunno, something like that.
jc: "She says it will be more like "Mr. Kept Fireman without caller ID" when I go on to the choir eternal."
My guess is she's not kidding on this one. Guys might fantasize about 2 women at a time, but trust me, "Mr. Kept Fireman" is probably more popular.
K dough, only you can endorse the conclusions of a study by relentlessly and remorsely mocking it!
Irony isn't just for taking wrinkles out of clothes anymore!
Hey, wow. Thanks?
Your are Excellent. And so is your site! Keep up the good work. Bookmarked.
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