Get it on Credit!!!
Thank god for Jim Flaherty. In his budget yesterday, he once again defended the impoverished and opressed middle class and the affluent in Canada. Flaherty, as he did before in Ontario, saved our country from the impending armed revolt of taxpayers who want more money in their pockets- and not just chump change like the stuff the poor use to buy junk food with.I mean seriously folks: How the hell are Canadians supposed to keep up $6,000 a month mortgage payments? How are our kids supposed to buy gas for our 16 friends' jet skis in Muskoka this summer? How are us soft-bodied, smooth-skinned Canucks supposed to keep up with skyrocketing condo fees at our manses on the Mexican Riviera?
And it gets worse. Did you know that if you can't afford to pay a pool maintenance company, you can actually get sick from swimming in brackish kidney pool water? There is now a non-refundable tax credit for that. Without the pedicure expertise of Mannie, the Phillipina house girl, in-grown toenails can fester and force ladies of the house to spend months away from their children at Swiss spas. Tax credit. I, for one, am tired of seeing Porches tarnished by ugly key marks on their doors, because their owners are working too hard to be able to take time to visit the dealership. Tax credit.
Those Liberals really fucked up our finances: Billions in surplusses every year. Bills paid. It was really disgusting. Our country needs to live like every other MasterVisa platinum card carrier- in debt and awash in luxury consumer goods! That is the new post-9-11 reality. Thank you Jimbo, for pushing our rich, dimpled asses back on to the gravy train, and the savings-hungry poor off the caboose.
I think what this budget says most of all to Canadians is "vote for me next spring. Pretty please?"
posted by K-Dough at 7:41 AM
56 Comments:
Bravo! You took the post right out of my fingers.
I'm quite happy to take whatever money/breaks we'll be provided. Who wouldn't? However, if it sacrifices our healthcare or our education system or the safety and security of our country then I won't support it.
This budget:
- provides money for our military, good.
- cuts the GST by 1 point, who cares?
- gives corporate tax breaks, fine.
- cancels our environmental programs, bad.
- provides tax credits, good.
- doesn't address the rising gasoline prices, bad.
- cancels the childcare program, bad.
Overall, it's a budget. Some good and some bad. We'll have to live with it because nobody wants to hit the election trail again right now.
There's a lot of truth to this. In fact, check out Garth Turner's article announcing his triumphant return to Ottawa after the last election.
www.garth.ca/columns/060129.shtml
If you can believe it, his website is entitled, Join Garth Turner MP in support of... Middle Class Canadians, and he actually wrote the following:
"...we need more politicians who are willing to stand up for the guy in the suburbs with a house with [sic -- worth?] hundreds of thousands of dollars and yet no RRSPs, because his personal taxes are crushing."
AND THIS:
"Middle class, suburban homeowners - also wondering how the federal government sent $2 billion in energy rebates to LOW-INCOME [my emphasis] people when middle-income people can't afford the natural gas bills, either."
Oh, and his analysis of yesterday's budget is entitled, you guessed it: "Garth's Middle Class Budget Analysis".
Peter,
It gives large corporations 2 point drop (from 21 to 19 per cent) on taxes, in addition to a bevy of other corporate tax cuts. Meanwhile, low income Canadians (well, and all of us actually) get a .5 percent (.25 per cent this year and .5 per cent next year and every year thereafter) INCREASE on their income tax.
How is this fine?
And before you say, but they're cutting the GST too, corporations will benefit from that as well. This is a big-business budget, NOT budget for the middle class(and certainly not for low-income Canadians, who are being screwed yet again).
Homo:
Yes, it's a budget that certainly benefits businesses. I'm not refuting that nor am I suggesting that it's going to help the poor. I stated that in my post. I also stated that there are some benefits to the budget as well.
Overall, it's not perfect and I'm not in complete agreement with it however, has there ever been a perfect budget to completely satisfy every single Canadian? never.
Overall, considering that actual platform of the Harperites, it could've been a lot worse.
The military has been provided funds, Toronto's transportation woes have recently been addressed, Canadian businesses are being encouraged (only furthering our impressively soaring dollar!) so I'm not too upset about it.
Fred,
Harper is a 'hockey' wonk. That's his commitment to Canada's cultural heritage. This budget comes at Stanley Cup time and is aimed at rink rats.
Then I will respectfully disagree with you Peter. In my opinion, the budget's a disaster for average people, and a godsend for bank shareholders and other assorted fatcats.
Oh, and the military's not getting all that much extra, actually. And the money they're giving Toronto for transit was set aside by the previous Liberal government.
Anonymous- Dude- is that you Warren Kinsella? C'mon. I know it is. If you are going to troll, at least give me the benefit of using your name to bolster my ratings!
Ya think it would? It might scare us off.
K-Dough, 10 out of 10 for the post. There are some subtleties about the budget I don't completely understand yet, but I do understand laughing my ass off. That's real!
Fred,
I hear ya. I guarantee you that Harper doesn't own any music playing device of any sort. Ditto for Flaherty and his four-foot something loud mouth.
I certainly don't want a gaggle of ego-centric artists running the country, but I find that Canadian politicians in general don't understand that without culture, we're fucked as a society. It doesn't even enter the equation for them.
Hi! I'm Anonymous. Wish I had Kinsella's CV and talent!I'm one lonely voice from a hockeyville-would-be town in Eastern Ontario. This budget will appeal strongly to my fellow citizens (average income low and dropping with the closure of the last big industry)because they are BIG consumers. We have plenty of fast food joints, donut shops and dollar stores to go with our Walmart.
All levels of government seem to be abandoning support for the Arts in preference for the military or the police. Recent polls found Canada the choice of many as a great place to live (if you don't mind the all-consuming attitude of the southern neighbours) but respondants had no sense of our history. Mournful times.
It's all about the greenbacks baby. Who needs art when you can fuck a dirty little fistful of dollars.
Line from Arctic Monkeys tune: There's only music, so that there's new ringtones
Is it just me, or would Flaherty make an awesome Fred Flintstone?
Pam: I meant Kinsella would attract a lot of jealous haters and Liberal ass-suckers. Ratings is ratings baby and I'm a fucking two-bit loaf of white bread whoreness, no matter how you slice me.
Anonymous: Everyone is either a consumer, or a thief trying to look like a consumer. That's what suburbia, gangsta culture, professional sports, pop music, politics etc etc etc is all about. We live in a world where consumption IS a culture. It's sick. It's like Rome is burning and we find meaning in buying all the pretty coloured matches.
But can someone please explain to me why we need tax cuts and credits? The majority of us enjoy the daily benefits of living in one of the world's most prestigious, richest and socially benevolent countries. What the fuck is so bad?
On average, we make tons doing relatively little in a global context, and yet have more than most people on this planet. We should chill the fuck out and start truning those tax breaks into real cash for poor people in our own fucking country. Damn.
Yes, you are a blog whore. You're so pretty that I forget what you really are. I guess he would boost your ratings.
You're bang on regarding the tas credits/cuts. I don't think the rink crowd cares if they have what amounts to an $80 tax credit for their child's minor hockey.
btw- anonymous- are you a Tims or a Starbucks ?
me? I'm a little independent French bakery down the street that makes the best dark pungent tall espressos for half the price that any those McCoffee fuckers fleece you for.
Mark,
That was vey artistic of you. Most people would just run and skip the shitting part....
Does anyone think a Liberal government budget would have looked any different?
A few pennies here and there maybe... but otherwise...
In other news...
Tsunami warning in south pacific, by the way. Fiji could be hit within 30 minutes...
Harding,
I've heard there's no actual confirmation of a tsunami yet...just a mega quake. Pretty scary shit!
J-Dog,
I'll go with the Gazoo analogy....I guess that makes us the "dumb-dumbs".
'There's no point for democracy when ignorance is celebrated ... insensitivity is standard and faith is being fancied over reason.' - NoFix
We are all dumb dumbs. As far as the budget, I just heard John McCallum, with his freakishly weird voice, claiming the budget hurts the most vulnerable the worst. While he may indeed be correct, Harding has a point about them mimicking the planned Liberal cuts.
The one thing I have to say I am exrtemely pissed about is their handling of the child care file. This petty attempt at buying votes will, in the process, further let the current system decay and limit capacity to deal with a growing shortage of child care spaces.
Scott Reid was right and Dithers should have had the fuckng balls to back him up and say it at the time. Average Canadians are as stupid and selfish as the plebes of any country. What the hell is government here for other than to equitably distribute cash amongst it's stupid citizenry?
K-Dough, I'm concerned. You're allowing the circus on the hill to get under your skin today. Here's the three things I think about when I feel that sinking "the government/my co-workers/the world is a shithole and I don't know how much more I can stand" feeling:
1) the large variety of wines and beers in my house
2)my cherry red Yamaha stage custom kit, and,
3) the 38 double D cup breasts I wake up beside every morning.
There, it worked...I'm blissfully happy again.
Leather- So you're a drunk who plays with models and sleeps with a blow up doll?
Actually, that does cheer me up! Thanks!
Hearhere: How did you sneak in here you pesky Tory recon BOT. I thought Chucker Canuck was the only true blue boy who patronized (literally) this blog?
K-Dough, LOL! You've got me pegged dude.
I only visit here to remind me of what hell's future citizens look like.
(seems like inferno is a pretty funny place).
Hot, CC. We look HOT.
pam,
I know. sometimes I tremble violently in attempts to resist the dark side.
Pam's breasts. Homo's whiskey. K-Dough's tatoos. Leather's drum roll. Even ASLHyE's KOMINTS.
Flippin' to the B side, are ya? I knew you would.
Speaking of which, they played that song on the Jack last week...a bunch'o friends called me up. Can't wait for the 2 cent royalty cheque from SOCAN.
LOL- my new tag line:
K-Dough's Canada
Tory Hell/Hedonists Heaven
Squid that was way too funny.
I will use the money I get to create a base beside 24 Sussex drive and annoy Harper until he changes. I will crash the summer Con BBQ circles to rally against harper with the help of that money.
Squid, before I change my Depends....I take it you don't have a huge collection of Margaret Atwood books or native throat singing recordings on the premises?
leather hit the bulls - not hit the cat's eye.
Leatherhands,
Margaret Atwood books wouldn't even make good ass wipe.
I do, however listen to CFWE which plays a lot of native throat singing records. My heart goes out to those guys, trying to preserve a dying art that is distinctively Canadian and at their own cost.... not like Fried of Ottawa with his greasy paw stuck in our pockets.
Oh, Christ, I just got a hardon. I opened up mu Edmonton SUN, and there's a picture of Rona Ambrose in an Oilers jersey. Now that's pure sex!
I saw it too Squid. Made me oily.
chuckers,
Damm tootin! And there was also some eye candy for homosuprior right behind her.
But, Rona, oh la la! Man, when I reincarnate, I want to be the crest on Rona's jersey!
Re: Squid's concise economic analysis:
Do you really need a reason to screw someone at the CBC? They have some real hotties working down there...
yeah, anna maria tremonti has me reaching for the viagra, if only i could get those cbc hotties to pose, you know..."the girls of the cbc" sell about a jillion copies.
K-Dough,
Heather Hiscock does it for me!
The trouble with Fried of Ottawa screwing someone from the CBC is that he'd want to get paid and would probably apply for a grant first, claiming that screwing Anna Marie is a fine art. Now, if me and Heather got it on, it'd be downright messy!
I'm feeling very left out because I can't think of open CBCer that I would let in my bed. Does Hockey Night in Canada count? It's on CBC. I could pick a hockey team..
ummmmm pam.........
Er, that wasn't exactly what I had in mind..And quit bashing the Senators, Don.
Mitsou all the way. And then there's Wendy Mesley.
K-Dough,
And anybody CBC female Peter Mansbridge hasn't fucked....
BTW, Pam, in my younger days I was described as 'A complete hockey team".
Nothing's changed ,if you get my drift!
Okay, maybe Mitsou. And squid, I'm speechless.Mansbridge? Wow, that would be a bad hangover.
the reason mansbridge is bald - too many u-turns on the bed sheets....whatta stud.
I have a terrible confession to make. About 10, no, 15 years ago, I had a horrible crush on Valerie Pringle. I often day-dreamed about waking up in a tent with her on a cold fall morning, completely naked in a sleeping bag. Ahhhhh...
c'mon leatherhands, ya bastard, it was this morning and your hands weren't that leathery.
Comme les chinois. K-Dough gets it right.
But frankly, except for radio, what the hell. (it would make a sensational blog post!)
K's post was about the budget..and we ended on the same topic, again. Sorry k-dough. We'll work harder.
whatta topic, Mansbridge should hire you. That is the studliest image I've ever had of him.
Come Clean,
it was actually THIS morning....but she started speaking in that perky voice and I went flaccid. Oh, sorry everybody....how 'bout that friggin' budget, eh?
you'll have no choice today but to at least address it once- it's on my mind like a bad car crash!
Thank God. I thought it was just me.
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