Nominate (read: validate) me!
Well, every other blog whore is asking you to nominate them for the Canadian Blog Awards (Sheena excepted), so I might as well grovel too. Someone nominate me. Please? I'll give you my collection of polaroids of blow jobs perfomed by pot-bellied French Canadian strippers from 1980s Northern metal tours. No? Ok. I'll give you my signed Guy Lafleur erection kit. On second thought, I might need that in a few years...
Ok, here is what K-Dough can do for you!
Nominate me and I'll come to your workplace and perform a naked impressionist mime treatment of Tom Waits' entire song catalogue.
Nominate me and I'll put a hot dog in every bun!
Nominate me and I'll put a cigar in every starving baby's mouth!
Nominate me and I'll put a blow-up Rona doll in every horny gun-owning redneck fuck's garage!
Nominate me and I'll put on a Richard Nixon mask, slap nipple clamps on Jason Kenney and ride him around a gay bar (The Beef Baron to be exact) screaming "why can't I be Peter's bitch?!!!!!!!".
Oh nevermind. It's useless. You hate me.
Ok, how about this: Nominate me in spite of all the lame-ass political bloggers currently nominated. Split the vote (into a pie of 3,176 pieces). Be a conscious observer if only for a moment.
If you don't nominate me I'm going to make myself puke and never talk to you again.
Love me. Look at me. Me, me, me, me, me.
No seriously- nominate me HERE!
Ok, here is what K-Dough can do for you!
Nominate me and I'll come to your workplace and perform a naked impressionist mime treatment of Tom Waits' entire song catalogue.
Nominate me and I'll put a hot dog in every bun!
Nominate me and I'll put a cigar in every starving baby's mouth!
Nominate me and I'll put a blow-up Rona doll in every horny gun-owning redneck fuck's garage!
Nominate me and I'll put on a Richard Nixon mask, slap nipple clamps on Jason Kenney and ride him around a gay bar (The Beef Baron to be exact) screaming "why can't I be Peter's bitch?!!!!!!!".
Oh nevermind. It's useless. You hate me.
Ok, how about this: Nominate me in spite of all the lame-ass political bloggers currently nominated. Split the vote (into a pie of 3,176 pieces). Be a conscious observer if only for a moment.
If you don't nominate me I'm going to make myself puke and never talk to you again.
Love me. Look at me. Me, me, me, me, me.
No seriously- nominate me HERE!
posted by K-Dough at 8:02 PM
33 Comments:
Hmmm, just because you were pleading so much I was going to nominate you but it seems that the nomination form has been taken down and the voting has started.
I will try again next year.
Joanne- no fair. E-mail McLelland and plead with him to make an exception. This is outrageous!
Even though you'd be competing against me, you could get nominated still at these:
http://2006.weblogawards.org/2006/11/nominations_best_individual_blog.php
I did send the Robert guy an email to see if he can add you to the best blog nominees. If he does, you have to thank me.
Please don't go to those drastic measures you mentioned to thank me. Everyone will think you are crazy.
Sask- thanks man. You're a little flat, but you rock. Get it flat- prairies. A ha ha ha ha errr. Ahem.
Thanks Joanne- you just bought yerself a ticket to the first ever to Iconoclast Bloggers Beer, Shirtless Punch Out and Puke Fest: coming soon to Toronto!
Ok, I nominated you for best blog. Happy?
Let me get clear on the rules before I commit... is it shirtless first, then puke? Or puke first, shirtless later? Cause and effect or what?
Shirtless always comes first! Sometimes the puke happens during the bare knuckled punch out though. Not good for anyone...
I'll be wearing my thigh-high 4" dog-kicking boots.
Great- I'll be wearing my snakeskin Belinda kickin' boots!
Yeehawwwwww!!! Urban cow bloggers rule!
BTW- Joanne, you nominated me for best blog where?
I sent Robert M an email asking him to please nominate you for best blog.
And I also nominated you for best blog at weblog awards.
SDA has been nominated for, drum roll please...Best Humour Blog!
Best Humour Blog!?! are you fucking kidding me? Humour hhhhaaaaa hahahaaa now that's funny!
If he doesn't include you it is not because my lack of determination. it is because you remember too late that you want to be nominated.
Sid Delbert Adelman? Are you kidding me? That guy is fucking hilarious. He's gold Jacko, pure gold. I mean, just the other day he told this story about a bagel, skin disease and a podiatrist...had me in fucking stitches.
ewwww- yuck!
By the way Joanne- lemme know what McLelland says... and thanks- that was sweet of you.
Awww, I am blushing. Sure, if he replies I shall tell you.
And SDA is a ultra conservative blog.
Thanks K. You just made me look dumb.
Dumb Schmumb. Stewpid is as stewpid does. And I meant it about inviting you to our Blogger fest too. Leather mentioned it...email me with your addy and we'll put you on the guest list.
kd, you don't need some silly award to know you're dynamite, kiddo.
there would be no chance of winning anyway. its all about people clicking a vote daily: SDA and Cherniak win that race hands down.
I know dude. But I'm vain. Realllllllllllllly vain. I probably think this song is about me...don't I?
K, thank you for the invite but I just around the time of your dinner fest I will be having end of term exams. So I am out this time but next time when all of you meet count me in too;)
Joanne's a chickenshit.
Cherniak isn't in the running really
http://www.progressivebloggers.ca/blog/diary.php?cmd=view&id=1507
oh thank gawd the nominations ended the other day!!!! those gift packages are somthing you'd find at joe's peep show and gift emporium.
If it's not too late and you are nominated, I promise I will vote early and often~
How unfortunate that there wasn't a category for Biggest Blog Whore. You'd have had it in the bag.
Pam- Um when you say "biggest" you mean most prolific right? I work hard to keep this blog whore frame as sliom and tight as possible baby!
You're So Vain
Err..Ya, that was what I meant. Sure.
LOL-Pot-bellied French Canadian strippers in the 80's...You must be referring to the paunchy mother/daughter team that toured the north in the mid-80s. I'm still having nightmares about that one.
shameless.
don't you work?
There were clubs we played in Northern Quebec where there was seriously only one stripper working, doing shows all day long.
At 6 pm she would be replaced by an older, more moustachy version. By then, the locals would have been drinking for about 8 hours already.
Ever seen a plastered Quebecois chick with a ZoZo tattoo on the breast she has tucked into her panties do a floor show to Helix's Rock You?
I have. I still have Nam-like flash backs.
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